Tiny Dick

Do you have a tiny dick?

Don’t worry, even fellas with a truly tiny dick can still have a lot of cock sucking fun with me! I mean, I’m not going to waste my time trying to suck off such a little dingus, but with a little creativity, you can still experience the joy of sucking cock, and being sucked! What on earth am I talking about? Well, if you’ve never tried a fleshlight, you should, because if you do it right, it’s just like having your dick sucked. Honest. (Besides, let’s be real: tiny dick losers like you have never had a real blowie, now have you?)

Here’s why guys with small penises need a fleshlight or cock sleeve…

You need something to take the place of all the oral you’re not getting. See, it really does feel good. You’d love it, if you could ever guilt trip some poor woman into giving you a pity suck. Suction and warmth and wet, all sliding and touching, moving up and down; you know you really want to experience it, and, as of yet, no one will agree to give you what you’re dreaming of. So before you slide down into the cesspit of the internet and start getting mad at women for having standards, take steps to provide for yourself! You need to either accept that you’re gonna have to pay for a woman to suck you off, or that you’ll need to pay for a toy to simulate the experience. And a toy can be washed, sterilized, and used again and again!

Don’t worry about the stigma of using a masturbation sleeve to simulate a blow job.

Thanks to the wonders of the internet, you never have to set foot in a shop to purchase your masturbation blow job simulator. Never make eye contact with a grinning shop girl as she bags up your dick sleeve, never have to browse for a cute mouth shaped silicone toy to stick your pathetic dick into, and definitely never have to face the temptation that is the back booths, where you just know you’ll wind up sucking off some dude with a cock that puts yours to utter shame. Just hit an online store! Go for a fleshlight, and pretend you’ve got enough to satisfy your favorite porn star, or pick up a Tenga Egg! Remember to wash after use, turn it inside out to dry, and enjoy the closest to a real blow job you’ll ever get. (Just really, don’t go near those booths! You’ll spend hours back there, sucking cock over and over, and then wonder where the time went.)

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Visit Ms. Harper’s blog: www.fetishphonesexblog.com